Category: Isaacisms

Isaac: [looking over Richard’s shoulder at a text message about ‘Refugee Camp]: “Do NOT send me to that camp!”

Slim Jim wrappers are really useful in school.  You can put your pencils in them overnight and then they smell good all day.

Isaac [pushing my hand away from his tablet]:  “You have sausage fingers.  This needs a pinky finger like mine!”

Isaac [at a scary movie]:  “Well, I know one thing.  I won’t need to cut my nails tonight!”

Isaac: “What do you think you would do if Paige died?”

Richard: “I don’t know.  She’s probably not going to die anytime soon, but I’m sure we would be okay.”

Isaac: “I was just thinking that you’re already so old, it would hardly be worth the trouble of getting married again.”

Isaac: “What kind of teenager do you think I’ll be?  A smart one?  A lazy one?  A normal high schooler who is bad and spray paints things?”
Richard: “Doesn’t matter. You’ll have been sent off to military school by then.”

Isaac (happily): “This slice of pizza is as big as Manhattan!”

Isaac (after some running around):  “I’m athletic.  I’m just not good at turning.”

Isaac: “Oh, dang it!  My face hurts from smiling too much.”

Isaac [enthusiastic,at the Ellendale (ND) Opera House]: “Dad, give them $1,000,000 so they can save this building!”

Richard: “Isaac, I don’t have $1,000,000.”

Isaac: “Sure you do. We have like $2,000,000 in the bank.”

Richard:  “What?  No we don’t.  We don’t have anywhere close to $2,000,000.”

Isaac [horrified]: “Oh, God!  We’re poor!”