Isaacisms

This is a Paige-ism

Paige [to her six year old son]:  “Isaac, I said put on your coat.  That’s a blazer, not a coat!  It’s cold out!”

Richard [laconically, having been forced to attend a basketball game]: “Go Local Sports Team.”

Isaac: “Their name is ‘Local Sports Team’ !?”

Isaac [pondering]:  “Why do some people say ‘Eight Men’ after prayers?”

[guest Isaacism]

Darren [excited]:  “Did you see that?!  I won two races!”

Richard: “Good job!”

[10 minutes later]

Darren [whining]: “Can we go home yet?  This is boring!”

Richard: “Um, I think you’ll want to stay till the end.”

[30 minutes later, Darren holding 2nd Place trophy and smiling]

Announcer:  “Winners will go on to the District to compete again”

Darren: “I have to race again?”

Richard: “You get to!  You get to race against the kids in other Packs who won.  Then we will see who the very, very fastest is.”

Darren [look of horror on his face]: “If I lose, do they take my trophy away?!”

Isaac [from bed]: “Mom? Mom?”

Paige: “No.  Go to sleep.”

Isaac: “But you said. . . “

Paige [interrupting]: “No.  Go to sleep.”

Isaac [getting sad]: “But you promised I could listen to Beethoven tonight!”

For the record:  1)He got his Beethoven.  2)He usually listens to the Mario theme.

Isaac: “Hey, want to see me puke backwards in slow motion!?” [slowly drinks a bottle of water].

[Working on describing the five senses]

Isaac:  “It’s a good thing we have a sense of taste.  If we didn’t, we wouldn’t have a mouth.  Our teeth would just be all shut up in there, and we couldn’t eat and when we watned to talk we would just go ‘mmmphggp, mmmmph, mmmph’.”

During a conversation about flags and citizenship

Richard: ‘What country are you a citizen of?”

Isaac: “America”

Richard: “Yep, the United State of America.  If you were born in France, what country would you be a citizen of?”

Isaac: “France?”

Richard: “Yep, probably.   And what are some ways you can be a good citizen of the United States?”

Isaac: “Not shoot France people!”

[Yes, this is true.  I don’t know, I just don’t know.]

Isaac:  “I wish I had one of those diving suits and could go real deep!”

Richard: “You can when you get older.  Did you know you can dive pretty deep without a suit or scuba or anything?”

Isaac: “Really?”

Richard:  “Yep.  Before my ear blew out I could do 20 feet.  But that’s nothing, I once saw my friend Ed go 40 feet.”

Isaac: “Without a suit or anything?”

Richard: “Yep.”

Isaac: “Did he take a knife?  He could have brought you sushi!”

Richard : If we lived in Fargo we would be closer to Yellowstone.
Paige: No.
Richard:  Don’t make me leave you for a wannabe city on the Red River!
Paige: [laughs]
Richard: [remorse for bad mouthing Fargo]